One of the key tenets that I tell my clients is that you need to be in a good dating state of mind in order to meet someone new. After reading Everything is F*cked: A Book About Hope (which you can purchase by clicking on the book cover and the bonus of fueling this blog), by Mark Manson. I can now go much deeper with what that means. Having a good dating state of mind is not about just being positive, and putting your best foot forward. Instead, it is about being realistic with who you are and having a firm grasp on what hope means to you, and more, understanding that sometimes life sucks and you’re OK with that.
How does that help you find the person of your dreams? Quite simply, opening yourself up to another person is tough. And it is even tougher if you are simply putting on a happy face for show. And being in place where you react with your emotions alone makes you more vulnerable to feeling hopeless when things don’t go your way.
This book is an incredibly simple read, and the third of his three books I have read (so a big fan and I will be doing a review on Models as the number self help book for men I coach!) If you have ever felt that life is just not fair. Or that you keep wishing and hoping for good things but they just aren’t happening, then this is the eye opener you need to read. Learning to accept life as it is. To be present in the moment, understanding that pain is the universal constant, and that is OK. And more to the point to give you a direct path to have a better life right now, instead of just waiting for it to happen once you find the one.
As always, Mark Manson talks in a relatable voice, with humour, and down to earth language, even when referencing Plato, Kant, and Nietzsche (which is not easy to do). So I highly recommend this book as an integral part of getting your best self out into the dating scene!